Embracing my Inner Evil

It happened again.

Today, I got dressed up in one of my finest suits, put on an exquisite cologne, to attend the most important meeting of this year. When I looked at myself in the mirror to assure myself that I’ll do well in the meeting, I saw something weird. I saw a flash of myself, in my pajamas, my hair all crumpled, and I was looking nowhere near what I actually looked like then. Before I could understand what that was, the image disappeared. When I asked my wife about that, she said I was imagining things, due to the pressure on my mind. She assured me and I left to the office, the image lost somewhere in my conscious brain.

This wasn’t the first time, though, that I was seeing disturbing images. For the first few times, it was like a glimmer, but it was so quick that I couldn’t even see it clearly. Since a few times before, I was able to make out the image clearly. But this time, the image was more disturbing. I just ignored it and focused my mind on the meeting that day. But, as hard as I tried, the more it kept coming back. Even in the meeting I was bothered by it. Luckily, being good at masking did help and the fact that I was disturbed didn’t have much effect on the meeting. The meeting was a success. My team had done a great job and I wanted to reward them. But due to my state of my mind, I blew the afternoon and went back home.

The first thing I did after going back home was to look in the mirror. This time, I was half-naked, and my body had a muscular structure, which was surprising, because I didn’t. I tried many things to calm myself down, but in vain. I couldn’t decide between hallucinating and pressure of work. I thought sleep might help me in this condition. After a few days of this similar routine, when I saw my face in the mirror, I was horrified. The image that was disturbing me was there, without going away, as it did previously.

There was a fully grown demon. There was no me. There was a demon. Some kind of energy was coming from inside it. If “it” is the right way to describe it.

“Embrace me, you mortal” came the voice.

“Who are you?” I asked.

“I am you, your dark side”

I was surprised at that reply. How can that be me? “What kind of trick is this? Who’s there? It’s enough, Come out and end this trick”

“You puny mortal. You and your idiotic ideas. Being good? Do you think you are good? Let me tell you something. The best of men hides the worst of demons. I’m yours”

Then I got a perfect view of him. He looked like a man, but the skin was hard and there were cracks. The skin almost looked as if it was formed of rock and as they were attached to each other separately, there were cracks. Horns were developed well above its head and they were made of bone. Blood oozing out of the pointed tip, it looked as if though, it had just killed something with its horns and not even bothered to clean up.   And the eyes, dark as the night, as if, one look at them and they can suck out your whole soul. Fingers were replaced with claws, and there was an opening along the center of its body. The energy was visible there. Yellowish in colour, striking fear in to the heart of anyone who saw it, there was a human heart at the center, still beating. And at the center of the forehead, there was a gem, perfectly carved into the shape of a diamond, yellow in colour. The sight at my so-called demon, made me cry.

“Who are you? What are you called? You’re not me” I asked, almost sobbing.

“I am the HEARTLESS Demon”

“No, you’re not. That is my past that I have left long ago. You are not what you say you are. You are just a nightmare. You are just a bad dream from which I am unable to wake up from”

“I am the HEARTLESS Demon and I always will be”

“No!”

“Embrace me, you puny mortal. You have left me to die. You thought turning to good will kill the bad in you. No. Every time, you neglected me, I have gained energy. I am you. Only when you embrace the bad with the good, your life will get balance. I am powerful enough to destroy you mortal. Embrace me, or this will be the end of the world as you know it” And with a sinister laugh, he disappeared.

My demons had come to attack. My demons have grown stronger. What did I do to deserve this?, I thought with those words still ringing in my ears,

I am the HEARTLESS Demon and I always will be.

….to be continued.

With the Annual Cultural Fest of BITS Pilani, Hyderabad Campus, PEARL, around the weekend, this story is dedicate to celebrating its theme “Live Evil”

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