The Great Escape

College life was really fun for me. The many discussions that we had. Ranging from our ability to change the world, to our inability to change the mess menu. And some discussions are worth sharing. And in one of our discussions came this topic, The Great Escape.

The poem used in this is called My Will

Here it goes:

“My master plan was complete. Now, I can have my way, ” I said aloud, even though there was no one other than me in the room. I laid out the plan, which I carefully inscribed, nay, drew on a large chart paper and started looking at it. It was so ingenuous. It was so simple. Why couldn’t I think of this before? Probably, this is what happens in life. We can see the most complex situations, or make the simplest one complex, but never the other way round. That requires work, doesn’t it? While making things complex didn’t require complex thinking.

My master plan to escape from this prison is ready. It might be a little difficult, owing to the guards that keep watch on me. Making sure, I don’t take any wrong decisions. But what did they know. They made sure I don’t do wrong things when I was here. They never told me why I was wrong coming here. A few incentives in any life are supposed to cover up the blunder I have made by choosing this path? Is that how it works? Don’t I have any reason to know if there is something else I could be doing and not this? If I could go back in time, I would do that. And never come back to this prison again.

It all started a long time ago. And not until recently, I have realized that I wasn’t at ease at what was happening. That’s the beauty of this place. You don’t know you are in a prison until later. The best way to keep a prisoner from escaping is to make sure that he doesn’t know he is in a prison. What an ingenuous plan? And it took me a long time for the fact to dawn on me. Reality came crashing down the walls when I was having coffee looking at a landscape view of mountains on that wall. It took me 5 years to understand my life was no better than what a prisoner has. Actually, his life is better. No, I don’t want to go to prison, if that is what you’re thinking. What I’m trying to say is that, there are moments in my life, when I wonder why I am doing this, but I have no definite answer. And the incentives I have is not really up to the satisfactory mark for my answer. For the first few months, it had made sense to work for money and all the other perks. But now, I don’t see any point in that anymore.

Money can be earned. Even in most disrespectful ways, it can be earned. Money can always be earned. But satisfaction? Can it be earned working in a place where you don’t have your liking? Doing something just to survive? Doing only that? Everyone needs a hobby and I am one of those people who, when asked for hobbies, will say Watching TV. I feel stupid when I said that all these years, but I had no other hobby than that. It had started a resentment and the past few months I have been planning my escape. When all other doors have closed on me, this was the final door that I had opened, out of force. I never wanted to do this. But, it had to be done. This reminds me of a verse from a poem a friend of mine had shown me in college. He became very sick of the life he was living. His writings were his escape from the reality that he was living in. I could only imagine the tragedy in his life that had made him create new worlds and live in those! But whatever he wrote made a lot of sense to me, probably now. He wrote a lot of dark ones and here’s the one verse from the poem.

I oppose your plan for me

I shall live of my own will

And if you stop me there

I will die in the greatest thrill

The last line always gave me chills. I will die in the greatest thrill. Of course, my friend has grown to become a famous writer and a published author. I think that’s what he meant by I shall live of my own will.

It was simple and it required not much of an elaborate plan. This was the plan:

I oppose your plan for me

I shall live of my own will

And if you stop me there

I will die in the greatest thrill

Each line was a checkpoint in my life and I spent many a day trying to understand if the checkpoint was actually reached or if I was imagining things. I have asked a bunch of people in my own office and also out of my office, but in the same field. All of them had the same reply. And it confirmed in me reaching each checkpoints. Only after I have reached the third checkpoint, I have made my final plan.

I will die in the greatest thrill

And the next dawn, I have started my journey. The journey to the end of this life. And a nice time to start that. As the light in the world was about to start, light in mine was about to end. A very auspicious time to start this journey. I started out to the nearest mountains. Many different things were there in this world, but nothing made me feel like mountains did. I felt magnificent, even though it was just for a second, I felt magnificent. I needed to feel magnificent, I was doing the right thing. I had no one to care about me and someone to tell this was wrong, wasn’t there. I had made my decision.

I will die in the greatest thrill

I have taken my bike, which I loved so much, to ascend the mountain. It took me till afternoon to reach there. I had a few minutes before the clock struck 12. When the light in the world is bright, I ascend into darkness. Never ending darkness. I have reached the zenith of the mountain. Zenith to Nadir. That was going to be a beautiful, thrilling journey.

I looked down at the world from there. From the edge of the cliff. I felt magnificent. The world is my oyster. I opened a note which I have written the final words of mine, taken from my friend’s creative genius.

I oppose your plan for me

I shall live of my own will

And if you try to stop me there

I will die in the greatest thrill

I threw the note towards the world, and after that, I followed it. And in a few moments, I am going to have the meeting of a lifetime. And this, is the journey of my lifetime. Those 4 lines kept repeating in my head.

 

I oppose your plan for me

I shall live of my own will

And if you try to stop me there

I will die in the greatest thrill

 

Surya

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