Thinking about jeopardy reminds me of the few things that I did. Or some things that I still do. I don’t know if that is true or not. But people who say that they have a very good intention of seeing me happy tell me that. Why would I jeopardize my own happiness? Why would I? Or Am I doing that without even knowing that this is what I do?
Yesterday, I called up a good friend of mine. She was not answering my calls for a week, so I have presumed that I would talk to her one day and try blaming her on the number of calls that she hasn’t answered. Expecting the same to happen even today, I have just put my phone aside, to ring for a while and disconnect. But to my surprise, she has picked up. (Well, you did guess that right. Otherwise, there would have been no point in me trying to tell that as part of this lengthy story, isn’t it?) And we had started talking. It started with her apologizing for not picking up my call for the whole week and how she has been zoned out for the whole week. I, from all my learning about human psychology and emotions (fancy words to say I spent my time looking at people feeling down), have asked her what happened? She replied that nothing had happened. And in this discussion, somewhere the topic has changed to me not coming out the darkness and melancholy that I have created for mnyself. Then the thoughts started pouring out. Is it? Do I do that? Really?
Honestly, it has been long since I felt sad. I don’t see the point in being sad anymomre and that gave me a push to be more happy. But am I really happy? Probably that is the question that I should be asking myself? Am I happy in my life? Am I doing what I want to do? Or am I just playing my part in this great stage.
A wise man once said “The world is a stage. And all of us are actors. The script is written and we are performing what can be called, the play of a lifetime” And knowing what will happen in the future or trying to understand what is happening now and doing something about it is not a very fruitful move. Still, I think. Am I jeopardizing my happiness by writing stuff on death?
I’d like to hear what you think. Please share your view in the comments.